Place cabbage in a deep large heavy saucepan; sprinkle cabbage with a few drops of water. Cover and simmer over moderate heat for 6 to 7 minutes; drain well. Or, place cabbage in a deep large heat-proof glass or ceramic bowl; cover with plastic wrap, allowing for a steam vent, and microwave at HIGH power for 2 to 3 minutes or until cabbage is wilted. Drain well.
In a medium bowl, combine cheese and flour, mixing well.
In a 1½-quart casserole lightly coated with non-caloric vegetable cooking spray, arrange a layer of cabbage and then a layer of cheese mixture; evenly sprinkle with some of the butter and salt, pepper, and cayenne pepper to taste. Repeat layers until all the cabbage and cheese mixture are used, finishing with butter and seasonings. Evenly pour milk over casserole. Evenly sprinkle crumbs or crushed chips over casserole.
Bake in a preheated moderate oven (350 degrees F.) for 30 minutes or until casserole is bubbly hot, cheese mixture melted, and crumb or chip topping is lightly browned. Serve immediately
Variation: If using only green cabbage, may add 2 to 3 tablespoons drained diced pimento to cabbage, if desired.